Saturday, July 24, 2010

Its on the house

After months of coercion my mother finally succeeded (for reasons unknown to the world) in converting me to a vegetarian.My f(r)iends often wondered in astonishment the Himalayan effort that must have required in convincing a carnivore such as yours truly into a rabbit. They failed to realise the huge effort on my part that stopped me from screaming out the truth, it was because of their appetites that dinosaurs no longer walked this planet. Probably one of the worst decisions of my life, walked around campus like a bear with a bad bad tooth ache. To heal my wounded appetite, I grabbed my cousin aka deranged roommate and trooped off to Matteo, my fantasy world's central perk, my red and purple couloured, coffee smelling, Shangri-la.

I love a table that has food on every surface, and as always there was the omnipresent (VEG) caesar's salad. We ate, we drank, we made ourselves look like stuffed turkeys. As we were finishing our caesar's salad, I, Chief-hawkeye, spotted a tiny, miniscule piece of chicken, it should have sent me into a "great white" like frenzy, but I very calmly pointed out this anomaly to the waiter, he blinked, twice, stared at the plate for several seconds and on my behest took it away. I was "scandalised". After a million apologies from the management, I said no to the waiter who wanted to know if I'd want anything else with a very pained expression. The fact was that I was stuffed beyond belief.

We continued to sit there for another hour oblivious to all that's happening around us. At long last we decided to leave the place and head home and called for the bill, the manager came over and in a grave I'm-about-to-deliver-a-eulogy tone declared that the entire meal was on the house! We exchanged incredulous looks, and in a very orderly manner made a quick exit. We marched out, and kept walking until we were well away from the place before bursting into shrieks of laughter. Obnoxious though we were at the restaurant, we really didn't have a problem with the ridiculously small piece of meat. Extremely glad that the restaurant authorities failed to grasp it though. And to think that I'd convinced myself that karma would bite me in the ass for all the uneaten pieces of meat.

1 comment:

Sulesh Kumar said...

Interesting..I had a Sindhi friend whose family had a similar experience at Popsies.They stuffed out a chicken piece from their Veg 'whatever' noodles..and his dad freaking yelled the shit out at the staff there..created a big scene (don't you dare feed chicken to a true Sindhi..)...and left in a haste without even finishing the remaining of their meatless Veg food. But I liked your approach, subtle mention of the crime that sends the opposite party into depths of despair by the mere subtlety of it...force the guilt Gods to play on their psyche and offer the greatest apology..in the form of a free meal...and then you guys having a nice laugh at the end of it all...